6 Action Steps for Churches Who Care About the Chronically Ill
Nearly 1 in 2 people in the United State of American have a chronic condition, which means, that if you’re not suffering, it’s likely someone you love who is silently enduring great hardships.
Too often, a chronic illness, such as fibromyalgia, or a chronic condition like back pain from a car accident, is invisible. Surprisingly, according to the U.S. Census Bureau, approximately 96% of the people who have an illness do not use an assistive device, for example, a wheelchair or cane. Pain is invisible and those who live with chronic illnesses do everything they can to look presentable, get to church, and sit through the service.
I distinctly remember trying to make it through a service. My rheumatoid arthritis was flaring a great deal. I stood up during worship when they announced, “Please stand,” but I had to grab onto the pew in front of me just to balance. With knees that need join replacement and feet that are deformed and breaking down, I nearly laughed as the worship song lyrics were, “I will stand in spite of pain.”
Even as I was surrounded by people in a church I loved, I still felt as though no one understood what I was going through-physically or emotionally.
It’s no secret that churches feel responsible for the many needs that already must be fulfilled in their church body and when someone shares another need it can be seen as an inconvenience. And these needs are visible ones. So the question from pastors is often, “If people aren’t saying anything about their pain, then that means they are dealing with it fine? Right? We tell them to send in prayer requests or let us know if they need anything and they don’t speak up, so evidently they are doing okay with it? Their faith should sustain them during those valleys.”
Let’s take a glimpse at some astonishing statistics:
- We usually assume the chronically ill are the elderly, but 60% of people who live with illness or daily chronic pain are between the ages of 18 and64. - 75% of marriages where one of the spouses have a chronic illness end in divorce - When you are chronically ill, depression is 15-20% higher than it is for the average person - Many studies have found that physical illness or uncontrollable physical pain are major factors in up to 70% of suicides.*
There is cause for great concern. Despite whether you can see the illnesses that are impacting people’s lives or not, your church body has many ailing bodies. And those who are hurting physically are often hurting emotionally and spiritually too. When Jesus speaks of the broken-hearted, I believe the chronically ill are a great portion of those who have fragile spirits.
So the question remains, if people don’t talk about their pain, but they still have a need to learn how to cope with it and find hope, how does a church reach out to them most effectively?
(1) Perform a survey about what people may desire that they are not mentioning to the church leadership. This is especially vital if you belong to a large church. People are less likely to ask for help when they don’t know the church staff intimately and reluctant to mention their illness. They are afraid they will be bombarded with all the scriptures about healing. A recent Barna group study discovered that larger churches were the least likely to have congregational care ministries listed as a priority (Church Priorities for 2005 Vary Considerably).
Ask questions on a survey such as, “If we provided transportation, such as a van ride, would it increase your ability to attend church? If you were too ill to attend church, would you listen to the service on the internet? Do you know who to call at the church if you occasionally need personal assistance (especially when the illness is chronic and not acute)? Are you able to see the worship song lyrics on the overhead, or would having them available on paper also be helpful? Please rate the comfort level of our seats.” Sit down with a group of people who live with chronic pain and brainstorm ideas with them about what would increase their church attendance or connection with the church and then prioritize what they say.
(2) Organize a care group, similar to other small groups your church has, for the chronically ill. For example, Rest Ministries, the largest Christian organization for those who live with chronic illness, has a small group program, HopeKeepers. They have a great selection of resource materials, Bible studies and support for group leaders. A group like this can be a turning point for people who really need the hands on support and understanding. Talking and praying about one’s illness week after week in a regular small group can feel like you are a burden to others. But having a small group environment that is a “safe place” where everyone “speaks the same language” and even laughs at the same silly stories can be refreshing. The group doesn’t need to be large. Even just having the chance to hand out with one other person can be life-changing. Be a church that recognizes the struggles of chronic illness and provide an oasis for people.
(3) Invite guest speakers who have physical disabilities or live with chronic illness. There are amazing people that speak at churches, sharing their testimony and a wonderful message. By letting them be on stage and reveal what God has done in their lives, despite physical challenges, lets people in your church who are ill see that you do in fact recognize their needs. It reminds them that you care, and perhaps most importantly of all, that you believe that people with physical challenges are still worthy to be used by God (a message few hear from their church). Speakers such as Dave Dravecky, Lisa Copen, Joni Eareckson Tada, Nick Vujicic, and many others, minister to the masses, not just those with disabilities.
(4) Consider adding a parish nurse to your staff, especially if your church body has a lot of seniors. Marquette University College of Nursing, which has an excellent parish nursing program, reports there are about 6000 parish nurses in United States. Many retired nurses are finding this area of ministry appealing and most parish nurse certification can be given by many hospitals. The parish nurse position description depends on your church’s needs and goals. For example, they may go to homes to monitor diabetes or high blood pressure of church members, organize walking groups, health fairs and screenings, and even help out with the chronic illness small group. The role of the parish nurse may be a better choice than a disabilities coordinator, depending on your church’s demographics. This person would help cover the disability ministry needs and work closely with the congregational care pastor.
(5) Stock up on caring resources that are available for people to borrow. Lots of people with chronic illness are on a fixed-income but they truly want the encouragement. Your church library should carry your many books on living with chronic illness such as “Why Can’t I Make People Understand?” or “Beyond Casseroles: 505 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend,” by Lisa Copen or Joni Eareckson Tada’s amazing book, “When God Weeps.” Purchase a few subscriptions to magazines such as “HopeKeepers”, “Guideposts” and even “Fibromyalgia Aware.” Don’t forget books on tape, audio presentations and large-print materials whenever they are available. Put up flyers or have brochures available about chronic illness or disability ministries. These include Joni and Friend’s “Wheels for the World” program or Rest Ministries’ annual outreach, “National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week.” Recruit a volunteer to assemble binders of information about national ministries and local resources. Also include Christian organizations, magazines and newsletters on topics of interest to Christian seniors, those who live with disabilities and illness, and caregivers.
(6) Finally, and perhaps most importantly, keep in mind that people with illness want to help serve. Not just be served. Proverbs 11:25 says, “He who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.” For example, if a woman with a chronic illness explains that she must resign from teaching Sunday school, make sure she knows that she is welcome to serve in other ways when she is ready. Though she no longer is physically able to teach four-year-olds, she may discover that she loves writing notes to people who have just been diagnosed with a chronic illness. A man may discover that he prefers mentoring another man with a chronic illness one-on-one, instead of leading a weekly Bible study. Let people know that you value wounded healers and that your church believes that God comforts us “so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God” (2 Corinthians 1:4).
About twice a month someone tells me that they went to their pastor with a request to start a chronic illness HopeKeepers ministry and they were told, “Come back when you are healed and then we will talk. You can’t very well minister to others with illness when you aren’t even healed yourself.” The broken hearts that arise from these comments is unbearable. It’s devastating to feel like God is using your illness for His glory and then be told you are no longer useful to the church-or even to God-until you are healed.
In Luke 14:21 Jesus shares a parable of a great banquet. When the host’s hospitality is turned down by his friends he responds by commanding, “Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind and the lame.” This is still a mandate to us today, but we must remember that to provide a place where we offer hospitality, we must first “go out” into our own pews and provide a place of refuge; as we make small changes in our church to create that oasis for people with illness, then these people in our church will naturally be comforted. And then they will go out into the community with open arms of understanding and minister to others along this journey.